Thursday, October 20, 2011

Childless in Church (Part II)

I am incredibly disillusioned with my Bible study right now. With a group of ladies from church, we're working through Beth Moore's To Live Is Christ. I was working through some of the homework and I just had to stop. It just wasn't going well.

This day's lesson is talking about Timothy and the legacy of faith through his mother and grandmother. So, let's talk about our children. Here came the one simple sentence that brought me to tears: "Hang in there parent!"

As someone who longs for children so much, such a simple phrase can be such a sharp sword. Now I know that most of the women who will follow this study are parents, because most women are, and once again, I know that there was no ill intent.

But my heart is broken. I know that tomorrow morning the ladies will all want to talk about how important it is for them to instill faith in their children, and I will have nothing to add. They will talk about ways that they teach the stories of the Bible and of the joy of watching their children grow to accept Christ.

Perhaps today is simply a bad day to have done this part of the study. Maybe my hormones are getting the best of me. It's possible that I'm just overly sensitive right now. But I feel like I owe it to myself to be honest about what I'm feeling, and I owe it to the other women in the some position to give them a little louder of a voice.

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